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Sex education
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| posted by catzeyez 1081 days ago |
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I am wondering when is a good time to talk to your kids about the birds and the bees. And how do you go about telling them what it is?
Some men were borned dicks.
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| posted by God de Vader 1081 days ago |
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on my sons 12th birtday i bring him along to wanchai and start teaching him..........lol....joke off course...however i am also wondering whats a good age and whats your approach?
I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get."
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| posted by catzeyez 1081 days ago |
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Honestly I don't have any idea. Any parents who have gone through this can give us some tips?
Some men were borned dicks.
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| posted by Waterslang 1081 days ago (edited 1081 days ago) |
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Raise them in an environment not afraid of visual nude. Answer all their remarks or questions. Type of answer will of course depend on their age.
As the old joke goes:
Dad: "let's talk about sex, son."
Son: "ok dad, what do want to know?"
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| posted by Gum Tree 1081 days ago |
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Ahem: I am an "accredited" sex ed teacher (from the Family Planning Association, lol). From what I learnt there and through experience with my own kids, it is never too early! BUT, you have to just talk to the age they are at and make it matter of fact. I mean fact, not cabbage patch talk.
Soooo - they ask at 5 "where did I come from" and you talk about dad and mum loving each other and mum makes an egg (NO, not like a hen, but sort of without the shell and a lot smaller) and dad makes sperm (which are like little wriggly tadpoles but much smaller) and when these too get together they start a baby inside a special place in mum called a uterus. And it is very special. It is great if you can use the "real" words right from the start and never ever show hesitation or embarrassment.
How does the baby get out? Mum has a special passage for babies to come out coz it would be yukky if the baby came out in the other passages. etc etc etc
The other thing is there a difference between "sex" education and "sexuality" education. The latter occurs from adolescence when the hormones are raging. This is when mums talk to their daughters about feelings and responsibility and birth control and stuff like that. And dads talk to sons about exactly the same things. Choose a time - it is never a comfortable experience and your kids at that age are likely to tell you to p*ss off, coz they are so uncomfortable with themselves. But the adult has to deal with that calmly and responsibly, imho.
If you stick to a few points and keep repeating them - safe sex, value yourself, choose your first partner wisely, don't have sex if you are drinking/drugging or if your partner has AND I am here to listen and support you no matter what - you should get through it all.
"Marooned on a rock with 80,000 and now 90,000 alcoholics and counting"
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| posted by green tea 1081 days ago |
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Very nice Gumtree[:)] Infact my son is so curious with the questions like how did I come to the world? If I was in Mummy's tummy How did I manage to get in there? Who brought him in to this world? Did it hurt mummy when he was in the tummy? Man..oh man...the questions never end. But I will make sure that each of his questions are answered proper according to his age and with out any cock and bull stories like "you were star brfore..God Gave you" blah..blah. Its very importent you let them grow in the natural, raw world with out any butter on it. Tell them the fact as they are.
I wasn't kissing him,
I was just telling his lips a secret!!!
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| posted by sunwaterandsky 1081 days ago |
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It is very important to answer your children's questions truthfully. It is ok to tell them that you feel a little embarassed and to talk about how that is related to the private nature of the subject.
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| posted by Waterslang 1081 days ago (edited 1081 days ago) |
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Why embarrassed? No need. Just answer the questions in a way that agrees with their age. In fact, lots of real youngsters (8 and below) don't even bother... if their environment is open. They have other things on their mind. As I saw it in earlier times those who were getting curious had had before wrong answers (kids are good at seeing through it) that did not satisfy their mood when they were sent off with the phony answers.
In fact they have less problems with the Santa lies than with the 'earthly' lies.
I remember I kept the Santa lie alive a few years after already knowing the truth... for obvious reasons.
And no need to go into endless explanations either. K.I.S.S. is the only way.
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| posted by catzeyez 1081 days ago |
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My kid hasn't asked me these questions yet, but I want to be prepared when one day they just popped out unexpectedly.
The parents of my kid's schoolmate told me they took a bath together, that is, dad, mom and kid. She said when they were bathing, they told the kid all the parts of the body, like "this is the breast", "this is the pxxis." I don't think I'm courageous enough to do that [:x)]
Some men were borned dicks.
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| posted by Waterslang 1081 days ago |
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Great, Catz,
In fact kids have other things on their mind as I said before. My experience was the same. But just treat it as is: normal. When I was a young dad, my daughter and I were in the tub together (till a certain age). She never was curious about the obvious differences between mom and dad, as she used to see us on a daily basis since ever.
And btw, there really is NO NEED to impose explanation when they don't ask for it. Would only confuse them. Most things come on a natural basis.
But when they ask... just answer, and yes again, according to their age. Just be prepared. No problem for adults to think"one step ahead", is there?
OK, only my opinion.
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| posted by sunwaterandsky 1081 days ago |
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Waterslang - I can't believe that I am saying this but, I agree with you.
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| posted by Waterslang 1081 days ago |
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Nobodies purfekt. LOL.
Just experience about real life, without the need of being "accredited".
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| posted by Gum Tree 1081 days ago |
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Don't forget that describing body parts is one thing - great you used the correct (????) names, but describing what these parts are there for is another issue. And ... just for the record and ffs, ws? that was an Aussie type of backhanded joke on myself, 'K? I mean ... what parent or teacher is ever a fully accredited sex educator when there are so many different scenarios all over the world? Not me.
"Marooned on a rock with 80,000 and now 90,000 alcoholics and counting"
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| posted by The Crone 1081 days ago |
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I said more or less what Gum Tree said and did more or less what ws did. I think it all worked out[:)]
But boys are different from girls and some mature at an earlier age, some are more curious, some less. just my 2 cents [:)]
*waves at catz*[8~2]
I dream again
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| posted by funcandy 1018 days ago |
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thanks for share with us ! good !
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| posted by yabadaba 1018 days ago |
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Very informative thread. Thanks GT & WS.
My mom told me that I was born out of her arm-pit! Seriously!
yaba...
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| posted by keymaker 1018 days ago |
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Why not just tell them that you buy children online and they are delivered by Fedex?
Caution: this post contains content that might lead to unrealistic expectation in real relationships. keep out of reach of immature people.
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| posted by n/a 1017 days ago |
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But do deal with the issue because schools here may not...can't speak for the different ones in the international schools ,but local kids complain to me that they learn 'zip' here as many adults/teachers are too embarrassed to discuss these things with their kids.As a teacher ,here and Oz ,I have to say that many kids in their teens have tragic lack of knowledge about their own bodies contraception and reproduction...I have taught several pregnant 14 year olds...
Miss P
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| posted by sunwaterandsky 1017 days ago |
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Yes Miss P, but I can tell you that teenage pregnancy is an issue everywhere. I used to be the volunteer chairperson of a local prenatal nutrition programme. In one small middle school - five 12 year olds were pregnant the last year I was involved in the programme.
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| posted by Gum Tree 1017 days ago |
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keymaker  . The latest version of the cabbage patch?
"Marooned on a rock with 80,000 and now 90,000 alcoholics and counting"
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| posted by sharonb 921 days ago |
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cats it also depends on ur religion
if u r catholic no need any sex education at all catholic don't use condom, not have sex before marriage,
no abortion neither no this no that just say no
www.zorpia.com/sharoncfl
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